Tons of brand new science fiction, fantasy and horror television is coming to get you through the hot, hot months of summer. And we've got the ultimate list. Here's our complete guide to the only television you should bother with this summer.
Already Returned:
Game of Thrones
Blood and guts and dragons.
Where: HBO
Salem
Angling to fill that "American Horror Story weird shit" void on your television, this series is bonkers. The premiere episode had a witch nursing a toad. With her third nipple.
Where: WGN
Orphan Black
Tatiana Maslany is a goddess and we are all just lucky to be in her world.
Where: BBC America
Adventure Time
We are on pins and needles awaiting the Masaaki Yuasa episode. Which will premiere sometime this June.
Where: Cartoon Network
Bloodlines
The Supernatural spinoff centered on the monster madness happening in one city, Chicago. Which is being run by Supernaturals.
Where: The CW
When: April 29
May
In The Flesh
Set after a zombie epidemic, In The Flesh follows the integration of cured "rotters" back into society. And this year the undead are done being second class citizens. Maybe their brush with death and resurrection makes them some sort of god? Or at least that's what the new cult of the undead from In The Flesh want others to believe.
Where: BBC America
When: May 10
Penny Dreadful
Starring Josh Hartnett and Eva Green Showtime's somewhat literary, vaguely historical supernatural horror series Penny Dreadful could be a lot of fun.
Where: Showtime
When: May 11
Rosemary's Baby Miniseries
A remake of the 1968 classic starring Zoe Saldana, plus Jason Isaacs (Awake) as the coven leader, Roman Castevet (originally played by Sidney Blackmer). True we're a bit hesitant on remakes such as this — but Saldana and Isaacs are pure drama gold.
Where: NBC
When: May 11
Labyrinth
Adapted from the Kate Mosse book, this British series will have its Stateside debut on The CW. The show jumps from modern days to medieval France connecting two women from across space and time as they both search for the Holy Grail.
Where: The CW
When: May 22 & 23
Crossbones
John Malkovich plays an insane pirate. Created by the great Neil Cross (Luther, Doctor Who) this series looks totally bananas, but also completely wonderful.
Where: NBC
When: May 30
June
Wilfred
The final season of Elijah Wood and Jason Gann's wonderfully mental comedy series about a dog owner who can speak with his pet. Also his pet isn't played by a dog but rather the show's co-creator in a grey dog suit.
Where: FXX
When: Sometime in June
Beauty and the Beast
Will these two pretty people ever be allowed to just live in peace? Probably not, or there wouldn't be any show.
Where: CW
When: June 2
The Leftovers
The Rapture comes, taking 10% of the world's population with it. And those left behind are forced to pick up the pieces of their lives. This is based on the book by Tom Perrotta (Election), and the author and Damon Lindelof have joined forces to bring this series to the small screen. And they've pulled together a crackerjack cast including Justin Theroux, Amy Brenneman, Christopher Eccleston and Liv Tyler.
Where: HBO
When: June 15
Defiance
Syfy returns to the new frontier town of Defiance, where our beloved alien citizens are struggling to keep their heads above the dirt.
Where: Syfy
When: June 19
Dominion
The Angels are dunzo with humanity, and they descend from on high to wipe out the human race. The remaining clumps of society rebuild in what remains of Las Vegas, but are never far from the constant threat of attacking angels. Thankfully one singular angel remains on the side of the humans. But will he be enough? Angel wars!
Where: Syfy
When: June 19
The Quest
The producers of The Lord of the Rings combined with the producers from The Amazing Race to make a fantasy reality TV series. Animatronics, prosthetics and actors will build a magical world that the contestants will have to… to… we're actually not sure, survive? It's a clever idea, let's hope they can pull it off.
Where: ABC
When: June 19
True Blood
Ready the vampire hankies, this is the final season of True Blood. Who will Sookie and her magical vagina wind up with? What will happen to the people of Bon Temps? Does anyone care anymore, or are we all just watching this for the weird sex stuff?
Where: HBO
When: June 22
The Last Ship
Michael Bay's post-apocalyptic series, set on a boat and based on the novel by William Brinkley. Set after a terrible pandemic kills 80% of the world's population The Last Ship follows one surviving US Navy ship as they float around the planet looking for a cure.
Where: TNT
When: June 22
Falling Skies
Anne and Alexis are alive, and now Alexis has magical powers. Also, you can't trust a Volm.
Where: TNT
When: June 22
Teen Wolf
Last season ended when we found out that Kate Argent is still alive and has transformed into some sort of supernatural being. What's going to happen next? Also Stiles, Stiles, Stiles! We're mad for Stiles!
Where: MTV
When: June 23
Under The Dome
Now that we know that the way to please the dome is to offer up magic eggs as a tribute, as opposed to killing half of the town, where will we go from here? And what will the Dome have to say about all this?
Where: CBS
When: June 30
July
The Strain
Guillermo del Toro's vampire mystery series combines science, the supernatural and a lot of over saturated colors. Based of the books, the series follows Dr. Ephraim Goodweather (the head of the NY CDC) as he unravels the mystery behind a plane that landed without any living passengers or crew members. Turns out, it's vampires. But it's so much better than just "vampires" — GDT's vampires are disgusting hive-minded monsters with stingers in their mouths who defecate while they feed. It's disgusting, and we can't wait.
Where: FX
When: Sometime in July
Extant
Very little is known about this new drama. But we do know that it stars Halle Berry as a female astronaut who returns home to her family after a year in outer space. Apparently she comes back "different." Steven Spielberg is the executive producer, so it has that going for it.
Where: CBS
When: July 9
Hemlock Grove
Eli Roth's werewolf horror series returns to Netflix, in another big dollop. The nicest thing we can say about this series is that it has a truly great werewolf transformation scene.
Where: Netflix
When: July 11
Masters of Sex
The sexy sex study continues, but what will happen to the science duo of Bill Masters and Virginia Johnson after the Doctor's big finale reveal? If you know history, you already know what happens to these two — but it's still fun to watch the dramatics play out. Especially when it's acted by Michael Sheen and Lizzy Caplan.
Where: Showtime
When: July 13
Penn & Teller: Fool Us
Penn & Teller's reality TV series, in which they ask participants to "fool them." Sometimes it works, but it usually doesn't.
Where: CW
When: July 30
Sharknado 2
The great Sharknado returns! And with a massive cast of celebrity cameos.
Where: Syfy
When: July 30
August
Doctor Who
Peter Capaldi takes center stage in the TARDIS as the brand new Doctor. His first episode was directed by Ben Wheatley and is reportedly all about what really happens when the Doctor regenerates. Which makes sense. Fingers crossed the 12th Doctor finds a home with fans.
Where: BBC
When: Sometime in August
Masters Of Illusion
Just a fun little magic show with a collection of new and exciting illusionists hosted by Dean Cain. So it will definitely be on forever.
Where: The CW
When: August 1
Witches of East End
Sexy witch play and wildly theatrical pregnancies return, although we're not sure when exactly.
Where: Lifetime
When: Sometime this Summer
Intruders
A clever little series created by Glen Morgan (The X-Files). Not much is known, and the official plot doesn't do us any favors, but here it is anyways. See if you can decipher the creepiness Mira Sorvino is channeling:
A contemporary, chilling, paranormal tale set in the moody Pacific Northwest, the (8×60) series spins a fascinating and complex web of drama. As strange, apparently unrelated events start happening, multiple story-lines – a missing wife, an assassin covering his crimes, a child on the run – begin to intertwine to reveal a conspiracy that will forever change our understanding of human nature.
Jack Whelan (John Simm), a former LAPD cop with a troubled and violent history, finds the quiet idyllic life he has crafted with his wife, Amy (Mira Sorvino) shattered when she goes missing. While Jack is consumed with an investigation, which threatens his very core, a sinister agent named Richard Shepherd (James Frain) is embarking on a series of lethal executions. Meanwhile, a distraught little girl named Madison (Millie Brown) runs away from home into a world of danger.
Where: BBC America
When: Sometime this Summer